Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
