meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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