Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
