i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Randomize
