Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
As shirtless as possible
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
