whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
