she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
