you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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