We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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