There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
