this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
