I can't breathe out the right side of my face
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
