your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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