watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
this will be a night to untag.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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