Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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