I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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