she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
she looked like the before picture.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize
