at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
