i barfeds in our rink
i just had sex bonerless
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
