walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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