they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
