New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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