She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
