It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
If I die, sorry about rent.
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