Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
