dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
