no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Randomize
