Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
