and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
now i know why i became what i already was.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize