from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
