their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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