walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Randomize
