He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
