Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I've blown a few things in my day
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
