Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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