Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
