Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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