hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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