Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
