i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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