tell your sister to shave her snatch
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
