just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
