I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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