she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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