Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
The air taste purple.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize