Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
