But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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