Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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