So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
