Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Randomize