I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
