I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
